Пусть мама услышит, Пусть мама придет, Пусть мама меня непременно найдет, Ведь так не бывает на свете – Снаружи замок в туалете ))). Сережа волнуется - раз, игорь волнуется - два, саша волнуется - три, оля пошла на УЗИ!!!))) Институт. Лекция. Профессор пишет голубым мелом на доске. С задних парт раздается крик:- Профессор, голубым не видно!Профессор в ответ:- Так пусть пересядут!! - Алло, милиция, срочно приезжайте, меня пытаются изнасила... ла... ла... ладно не приезжайте. Плакала береза, плакала осина, только конопля - ржала как скотина...))))))))))) водка "Беленькая"! Под каждой крышечкой - белочка! собери 5 белочек и тебе крышечка! Водка, пиво и вино-здраствуй мама, я в гавно... хотите изменить походку??? Не пейте ЧАЙ, а пейте ВОДКУ!!))))) надо позвонить маме и сказать где я...: "Але, мама! Где я?!?!")))) Родители хотели, что бы из меня вышел толк......ТАК И ПОЛУЧИЛОСЬ.....толк вышел.....бестолочь осталась -ммм.....девушка, у вас такие ножки, вы меня просто сразили.... -ммм...молодой человек, у вас такая рожа, вы меня просто напугали Коктейль "Ночной засранец": 50 гр. снотворного + 50 гр. слабительного. Есть три вещи, на которые страшно смотреть с утра после пьянки: лицо, кошелек и список исходящих вызовов.)) Не могу уснуть, что ж, посчитаем баранов: Рома, Дима, Андрей, Сережа... И сказала Фея Золушке :"В двенадцать часов волшебство отпустит и начнется сушняк!" Пиво приходит в желудок, а там водка! - Подвинься! - Не подвинусь! - А ну пошли выйдем! ))Не суди да не судим будешь"В Ужгород гості міста найчастіше попадають на поїзді. На кожному вокзалі ми бачимо надпис з назвою міста і тільки в Ужгороді нас зустрічає надпис - "Зал очікування". Вокзал сука епічний. Мало хто знає, що вокзал це дембельский акорд міністра транспорту Кирпи перед самогубством. Його побудували за 3 місяці і 10% рісту рейтингу Януковича на виборах в 2004 році. Капушанська сука довга. Довга і незрозуміла. То вона вулиця Перемоги то Капушанська, хер поймеш. Тому часто пишуть Капушанська (Перемоги). Саме Капушанська породила Зіну, що заполонила все місто. Новий район сука опасний. Як "13 район" тільки гірше. По статистиці в Новому районі, на одного жителя припадає 2, 3 гопніка, 3, 5 ларька з пивом і 4, 7 аптеки. Таксисти що везуть в Новий район, завжди беруть гроші наперед. Дастор сука мажорний. Шмотки куплені в Дасторі на 2 поверсі, коштують в 5 разів дорожче і носяться в 1, 5 рази довше чим шмотки куплені не в Дасторі. Ходять легенди одного разу меру міста не вистачило грошей на касі, щоб розрахуватися. Вулиця Грушевського харить. Особливо зранку. Її побудували щоб маршрутки могли їхати чим подовше в центр. Набережна сука красива. Красива і темна. І це каг би намекає.. 80% всього пива Ужгорода випивається саме тут. Бомжі що контролюють збір пляшок на набці, кожну зиму відпочивають в Єгипті. Ужгородський замок сука старий. Його побудували білі хорвати, що зупинилися на перекур перед походом на Балкани. Як в кожному порядному замку, Ужгородський має привида. Це сторож, якому заборгували зарплату ще з 1993 року в купонах. Пьяний базар сука конкретний. Назва говорить сама за себе. Зовсім не випадково що Ужгородський УБОЗ знаходиться саме біля нього, що забезпечує феноменальну статистику розкритих справ. Якшо на пьяному базарі щось не можна купити, значить його не існує в природі. Радванка сука колоритна. Якби режисер фільму "Мільйонер з нетрів" Дені Бойл знав про Радванку, він би знімав фільм саме там. Радванка ідеальне місце для іноземних журналістів знімати сюжети про бідну і нещасну Україну. Проспект сука психоделічний. Наймасштабніша соціальна реклама в світі про шкідливий вплив наркотиків та алкоголю. Пройдіться вечером по проспекту під пильним погля http://46.211.229.84/98903712

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